There are some harsh realities it comes to making it out there in the big bad world! You may be wondering what is going on? Well I'm here to give you a few tips as to some possible problems you might be having! Check them out below.
1. Being an introvert
You go to an event. A lot of people are there. Suddenly you can't take the environment anymore and just need to get home. You go home, feel better. Then a few days later you feel lonely and like you barely have any friends. Is this you? Well you're probably an introvert! So am I. Our brains are wired a little differently than our more lucky extrovert counterparts. I'm in an elevator with a next door neighbor. She says hi. I think you know what? Let's engage in some small talk. I now think of how I am being perceived. I say Hi back. Ask her how her day was. Now I'm wondering how I just said that. Did I say it in an emotionally enthusiastic way? Maybe not. Let's try and gather all my energy for the next sentence. Did it work? Maybe? I wish her a good night, go into my apartment, and feel extremely relieved. That felt so stressing, and it was just small talk!!
1. Being an introvert
You go to an event. A lot of people are there. Suddenly you can't take the environment anymore and just need to get home. You go home, feel better. Then a few days later you feel lonely and like you barely have any friends. Is this you? Well you're probably an introvert! So am I. Our brains are wired a little differently than our more lucky extrovert counterparts. I'm in an elevator with a next door neighbor. She says hi. I think you know what? Let's engage in some small talk. I now think of how I am being perceived. I say Hi back. Ask her how her day was. Now I'm wondering how I just said that. Did I say it in an emotionally enthusiastic way? Maybe not. Let's try and gather all my energy for the next sentence. Did it work? Maybe? I wish her a good night, go into my apartment, and feel extremely relieved. That felt so stressing, and it was just small talk!!
Do you realize how many friends and extra favors I could get were I not too introverted to just casually chat it up with some people? Ever heard of the story of that one introverted dude who would try so hard to be an extrovert that he'd say hi to everybody in school and show up to as many parties as he could to really fit in, only to go back home to collapse from all of that hard work?? For us introverts it's extremely strenuous and uncomfortable work just to say hi, because of all the thinking and brain power involved. However for extroverts, This is how they get their energy and happiness!!! Connections happen, you meet more people and BOOM. You're Donald Trump's wife! In American society, extroversion wins!
2. Being an average looking guy
You go to a party. People stand around with drinks. No one really says hi to you. You are an introvert. You have to make the first move. Making the first move is incredibly difficult because of all the stress you get from having to think and show enthusiasm in a conversation that naturally comes for extroverts. You try anyway. You see two girls standing with party cups having a conversation with each other. You attempt to join in. They kind of let you at first by answering a few of your questions you forced yourself to ask, but then you find yourself bumped out as they continue to carry on their conversation with each other as if you weren't there standing in front of them. You give up, sit down and scroll through random Facebook posts on your phone. No one else talks to you for the rest of the party. You go home. Wonder why you have no friends.
Here's my cure. Next time, be born a cute girl with tits. Maybe then they'll save you the work and say hello first. They'll force themselves to keep the conversation going just so they can keep talking to you and pretend to care about something besides your tits while you talk about your passions.
3. You are depressed.
"You feel down? Come on man cheer up, it'll pass. Stop being depressed."
Yeah....depression works more like this: You love playing volleyball on your team. Suddenly it's not fun anymore. So you stop going. I mean they bench you all the time anyway. Whatever. You like your French class and are learning some cool phrases. Suddenly you wonder what's the point and stop really trying or showing up to class anymore. You like watching movies. Suddenly, you're too lazy to watch movies anymore and can't get past the first 5 minutes of any movie you do try to watch. You love video games. Suddenly they're not as engaging as they were before. Now you do nothing at all but sleep. You realize that you no longer really do a ton of things you used to, because they just don't feel like they matter. Nothing feels like it matters. Two years go by. You now do nothing with your life when you once had a lot going for you. Does this sound like you? You're probably depressed.
3. You are depressed.
"You feel down? Come on man cheer up, it'll pass. Stop being depressed."
Yeah....depression works more like this: You love playing volleyball on your team. Suddenly it's not fun anymore. So you stop going. I mean they bench you all the time anyway. Whatever. You like your French class and are learning some cool phrases. Suddenly you wonder what's the point and stop really trying or showing up to class anymore. You like watching movies. Suddenly, you're too lazy to watch movies anymore and can't get past the first 5 minutes of any movie you do try to watch. You love video games. Suddenly they're not as engaging as they were before. Now you do nothing at all but sleep. You realize that you no longer really do a ton of things you used to, because they just don't feel like they matter. Nothing feels like it matters. Two years go by. You now do nothing with your life when you once had a lot going for you. Does this sound like you? You're probably depressed.
It keeps you from going out. It keeps you from really trying to get anything done. It eats away at you and you simply feel okay with sleeping and never waking up. Sounds productive? No, it doesn't.
I don't really have anything to suggest on what to do except read up about it. Find people to talk to. People who will listen. People who will not say "Don't be depressed." People who won't simply dismiss how you're feeling. People who will be there for you.
4. You don't drink or do drugs
"Sorry, I didn't think you'd have fun" - your friend after you ask them why they didn't invite you to their party.
Yep. This is the reality in the United States of America. Most people between 15-30 will be partying it up, getting wasted, and doing drugs together! What an escape it is! drink/smoke/ingest all your troubles away! Life is stressful, no? All the friends you make. All the crazy times you have! All the stories you can tell from all the fuckups you or your friend had that one night! All the music you supposedly can write when on a higher plane of thought. Everyone is doing it! Forget all those "don't do drugs" commercials and seminars you've seen. Yeah right. They're just uptight people who can't have fun.
Well guess what? If you're one of the few who don't regularly engage in alcohol or substances, no one will want to be around you. Yep. They will wonder why you're so uptight. Why can't you loosen up like the rest? They will not want to hang out with you. They will not invite you to any parties where you could have made friends (if you weren't too introverted to begin with). They will feel awkward having you being the only one not smoking it up, popping pills or chugging with them. I mean all those bonding opportunities over a drink or a blunt you could have had? What's wrong with you?
I don't really have anything to suggest on what to do except read up about it. Find people to talk to. People who will listen. People who will not say "Don't be depressed." People who won't simply dismiss how you're feeling. People who will be there for you.
4. You don't drink or do drugs
"Sorry, I didn't think you'd have fun" - your friend after you ask them why they didn't invite you to their party.
Yep. This is the reality in the United States of America. Most people between 15-30 will be partying it up, getting wasted, and doing drugs together! What an escape it is! drink/smoke/ingest all your troubles away! Life is stressful, no? All the friends you make. All the crazy times you have! All the stories you can tell from all the fuckups you or your friend had that one night! All the music you supposedly can write when on a higher plane of thought. Everyone is doing it! Forget all those "don't do drugs" commercials and seminars you've seen. Yeah right. They're just uptight people who can't have fun.
Well guess what? If you're one of the few who don't regularly engage in alcohol or substances, no one will want to be around you. Yep. They will wonder why you're so uptight. Why can't you loosen up like the rest? They will not want to hang out with you. They will not invite you to any parties where you could have made friends (if you weren't too introverted to begin with). They will feel awkward having you being the only one not smoking it up, popping pills or chugging with them. I mean all those bonding opportunities over a drink or a blunt you could have had? What's wrong with you?
"But who needs them anyway?" you ask while you sit alone in your room (or restaurant, or park, depending your mood). Yeah. You with your band who wanted people to come to your show. Where are they now? Oh? They're going to the show of that other dude's band. Why? Oh right. His band does have some cool songs. But so do you! But wait. He also loves to get high and drunk every day and gives out free weed to his friends at parties. And he happens to be having an after-party after this show, and you're not invited! Why? Because no one thinks you would enjoy it!